"PROVERBS AND THE CHRISTIAN"
Wisdom In Selecting A Spouse
INTRODUCTION
- The value of "The Book Of Proverbs" is that it provides wisdom from
God to guide us in every realm of life
- Whether it be family, business, social or spiritual relationships, we
can find "inspired advice" that enables us to walk in wisdom,
"redeeming the time, because the days are evil" - Ep 5:15-17
- The purpose of this series is not to present an exhaustive study of
the Proverbs, but to demonstrate in a few lessons its practicality in
providing wisdom for the Christian today
[In this study, the first of three dealing with "family relationships",
we shall glean what wisdom we can from "The Book Of Proverbs" in regards
to selecting a spouse...]
- ADVICE IN SELECTING A WIFE
- THE IMPORTANCE OF MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE...
- Much happiness in life depends upon make the right choice
- Pr 12:4
- A good choice greatly enhances the life of the husband
- But the wrong choice can destroy a man from the inside out!
- It is folly to think that a mistake in this area can be easily
corrected
- Many think divorce can be an easy solution
- But God hates divorce (Mal 2:16), and remarriage may not
be a viable option for the disciple of Christ - Mt 19:8-9
- Even when it is, if there are children the selection you
made will ALWAYS be the mother of your children (for better
or worse!)
- SOME GUIDELINES FOR FINDING A GOOD WIFE...
- Seek help from God - Pr 19:14
- Success in this "venture" may depend more upon God than we
think!
- In view of the seriousness of this matter, dare we go about
it alone?
- Do not place priority on "good looks" alone - Pr 31:30
- Beauty is skin-deep, temporary, and to which we can easily
grow accustomed
- It is therefore a poor foundation upon which to build a
life-long relationship
- Sadly, most marriages are built on little more than physical
attraction
- Instead, look for these characteristics in a woman:
- The fear of the Lord - Pr 31:30
- Such a woman possesses the beginning of wisdom - Pr 1:7
- Having a wife who is a devout Christian, then, should be
a primary concern
- Discretion - Pr 11:22
- This is the ability to do the right thing at the right
time
- Without this, beauty is worthless, and can even be the
object of ridicule (e.g., "dumb blonde" jokes)
- Wisdom - Pr 14:1
- With this virtue in a woman, a good home can be built
- Without it, efforts by the husband will be undermined by
the wife!
- To be avoided is the woman who is contentious (argumentative)!
- Picturesque descriptions of such a woman are found in
Pr 19:13; 27:15-16
- My grandmother (a faithful Christian who as a widow raised
six children through the Great Depression, and remained a
widow for over fifty years), pointed out these two verses to
me when I was a teen-ager: Pr 21:9,19
[It is better to be single and alone, than to be married to the wrong
person. To be married to a godly woman, however, is a wonderful
blessing from the Lord (Pr 18:22). With the help God gives us in "The
Book of Proverbs," we can increase the likelihood of finding a good
spouse.
The same is true for women seeking a good husband. Much of what was
said earlier is applicable, but there is more we can glean from the
Proverbs...]
- ADVICE IN SELECTING A HUSBAND
- THERE ARE WAYS TO LEARN A LOT ABOUT A MAN...
- How does he treat animals? This reveals a lot about his
character - cf. Pr 12:10
- Does he listen to the advice of others? That will tell you
whether he is a fool, or a wise person - Pr 12:15
- What type of company does he keep? You might be destroyed
right along with him - Pr 13:20
- Is he quick-tempered? That determines whether he is a person
of understanding - Pr 14:29
- How does he make money? You will suffer the consequences of
his business decisions - Pr 15:27
- Does he feel like he always has to put in his "two-cents"
worth? If so, he lacks knowledge and a calm spirit - Pr 17:27-28
- Does he have compassion for the poor? If so, his prayers will
then be answered - Pr 21:13
- MEN TO AVOID...
- The womanizer (or flirter). He will destroy himself and hurt
all those involved - Pr 6:27-29
- A quick-tempered man. You will become like him and destroy
yourself as well - Pr 22:24-25
- A drinker - cf. Pr 23:29-30
CONCLUSION
- Some of the most important decisions we make in this life will be...
- With whom shall I spend my life? (Divorce and remarriage is not
an option for the faithful Christian, with one exception - Mt
19:9)
- Who shall be the father or mother of my children? (This choice
cannot be undone once the children are born)
- Dare we make such decisions without consulting the wisdom found in
the Word of God?
- This certainly does not exhaust all that "The Book of Proverbs"
has to say about selecting a spouse
- But I trust that we are seeing that the Proverbs are extremely
practical, worthy of our careful study and application to our
lives
- In the next lesson, we shall consider "gems" of wisdom in regards to
BEING a good spouse...
Speaking of important decisions...have you made the most important
decision you will ever make in your life concerning Jesus Christ?